I'm having a pretty good week, D-Weightedly speaking. Working out hard, eating well, resisting temptations (ALERT! ALERT! Retirement party at work on Tuesday! GAAAAHHH hors d'oeuvres everywhere!!! I ate a damn banana) and this morning my scale is pretending I've lost another pound (149), and I'm just gonna go ahead and believe it.
So yesterday I was brushing my hair in the morning and I looked in the mirror and HOLY GEEZ THERE ARE BULGES COMING OUT OF MY ARMS!!! Check it out, I have muscle tone! Okay fine, I still have flab tone too, but I think the biceps may be starting to gain a bit on the swaying suspension bridges that are my underarms. I recreated the image this morning for you so you can bask in my success yourselves:
Anyway, I was at the gym last night and telling Derek about this minor success, and he referred to these strange bulges as my "guns". I'm like, my GUNS! I have GUNS! I retorted, "My lovely lady guns!" It was all v. exciting.So last night I had this crazy dream that my biceps were no longer these subtle, shapely, sexy arm humps, but had turned into freakish Swanson's Hungry Man biceps, like I'm a competitive lumberjack or an Olympic rower or... I don't know... a man. I flexed and they had this cartoonish reaction. It was weird and a little disconcerting. Michelle Obama's arms don't do that. So I think I'm gonna have to watch it. No steroids for me.
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